Witchers are sterile, but that doesn’t mean they don’t get it on! Unlike a lot of CRPGs, your little Geralt actually has a personality-and a taste for womenfolk. Any time you make it with a lady, you’ll get a “Sex Card”, a picture of the character in question-essentially a illustration on the Boris Vallejo level (as far as nudity goes). You could call these “Romance Cards” if you’re being politically correct, but i’m not. The “romance” involved in some of these encounters is dubious, at best. You get them when you have sex with the character in quesiton. They’re Sex Cards.

It’s a real shame the U.S. release has been censored, but it’s nice to see that the game itself doesn’t awkwardly avoid the situation entirely. It’s an mature-rated game after all. To view the Sex Cards at any time look in the journal under the “Characters” entry, all characters have their own image. Geralt’s special ladies will have an obvious red heart on the frame of their image for you to click on. Collect them all! Or as many as you can in one playthrough, anyways. It should go without saying, but, spoilers abound ahead .

Prologue¶

Triss #1

In Kaer Morhen, complete the quest “A Potion for Triss” . Give Triss the potion, and select first “I suppose we have some time.” Then choose “It’s not your fault. You helped us.”

Chapter 1¶

Abigail

You have to side with Abigail throughout the chapter, which means you should generally not agree to do bad things to the “witch”. You’ll have to side against the other townsfolk for this quest, but hey, they’re the bad guys anyways. You can get her Sex Card at the end of the chapter after rescuing Alvin in the cave.

People of the Outskirts

Near a group of three houses on the corner of the road leading to the cave is a peasant woman wearing green and yellow clothes. Talk to her and give her some tulips and say “What do you say we find a nook somewhere…”

Vesna

Go near the gates of the outskirts outpost by the Dwarven Blacksmith during the night (around 21:00 or so). Vesna Hood, the bar wench from the Country Inn will be getting harrassed by some… well… rapists. Help her and escort her back to her grandmothers house safely. Then ask to see her again. Go to the Old Mill at dusk with some wine (Toussaint Red will do.) Talk to Vesna and give her the wine and enjoy a haunting experience.

Chapter 2¶

Prostitutes

You can simply pay any prostitute to get this card. If you do the quest “Working Girls” for Carmen and accept the non-monetary reward, you’ll be able to sleep with hookers by simply bringing them flowers, which you can buy from a peddler for about 10 orens… Which is a considerable discount, indeed.

Poor Townsfolk

Walking around town during the day you’ll find a townsperson named “Gossip”. Talk to her and exhaust all the dialogue options. Keep talking to her about there being a Witcher in town and Geralt will eventually tell the woman who he is. She wants proof to show her friends, either some gloves (golden or red) or a diamond. She’ll be very thankful.

Half-Elves

Do the quest “A Ghost Story” to get ambushed by some thugs. After they’re dead talk to the Half Elf and she’ll invite you to her house. The house is across from Vivaldi’s house, separated by a fence. Go inside and talk to her. Try to talk elven with her, translate her first sentence by calling her the ‘sun child’. Next choose the option along the lines of “I know what you’re going to say next”.

Druids

In the Swamp Forest druid grove (in the top left of the screen) during the quest “A Lost Lamb” ask Morenn about the missing boy. Talk to any druid and ask about the missing boy. Go back and talk to Morenn and she’ll ask you to get a Wolf Pelt to prove your prowess. Get one, and give it to her. Answer “Intimacy without procreation can be good.” Followed by “sex relieves stress” to get her card.

Shani #1

You can obtain Shani’s Sex Card by completing the quest “Old Friend of Mine” . First, bring Shani five doses of Celandine to help out around the Hospital. Next, complete the quest “Anatomy of a Crime” . After that quest is done, visit Shani at home to discover she’s trying to organize a party. Bring her Cherry Spirit Cordial, Mettina Rose, and Temerian Rye, then pick a guest to bring (either Siegfried, Zoltan Chivay, or Carmen). After the party give Shani some Red Roses to obtain the card.

Chapter 3¶

Adda

During the quest “A Posh Reception” , when you talk to Adda for the second time she’ll end up asking you to fetch her favorite meal before she’ll talk about her father’s politics. Talk to Veleard and give him some strong alcohol to learn that Thaler knows what this dish is. As for Thaler, you’ll need to fetch him a “Mysterious Note” from a room near the stairs before he’ll reveal that she likes rare Catoblepas. Talk to Triss and ask her to conjure some up, then bring it to Adda. After this, it’s more difficult to keep her off of you than it is to obtain her Sex Card.

Blue Eyes

During the quest ‘Blue Eyes’ you’ll be asked by Patrick to look for his sister and rescue her, if possible. Head over to the “House of the Queen of the Night” and talk to the Blue-Eyed Lass. This is one of the few times where sexual intercourse actually furthers a quest-being a Witcher must be grand, indeed. She’ll ask for either 500 Orens (and the price will go up if you try to haggle), or 300 Orens, if you show her the “House of the Night Signet Ring” . Cheaper still, she’s fond of gems, like all the other courtesans in this district. Give her a Sapphire and she’ll put out. Note that her Sex Card is identical to the “Courtesan” Sex Card … it’s just under a different name in the Journal.

Clerks

In the Town Hall building of the Trade Quarter, upstairs, you can find a small mob of female Clerks going about their daily tasks. Several of them will allow Geralt to flirt with them. Pick dialogue option #3 to call them naughty, and it’ll end with them asking for a gift. Give them a Diamond to score this Sex Card.

Courtesan

“Prostitutes” lined the streets in the Temple Quarter, but in the cleaner Trade Quarter, you’ll find the upscale “Courtesans” renting out their services, instead. If you shell out several hundred Orens, you can spend some time with them. If you obtain the “House of the Night Signet Ring” from Erkyn Blunt you can show it off to drop the price by about half. The best option, however, is to give them a gemstone-any gemstone-which will substitute for the Orens. A piece of Amber sells for about 40 Orens, which is a nice discount by any standards.

Merchants

In the Trade Quarter during the day you can find a “Noblewoman” wearing red and white walking around. Talk to her and she’ll admire Geralt’s rugged manliness. Keep picking dialogue option #1 and she’ll ask for part of a beast. Although she’s not specific in her wording, she wants a Kikimore’s Claw. Give her one and she’ll offer to take you to her house while her husband is away.

Shani #2

During the quest “The Source” , you’ll be forced to send Alvin to stay with either Shani or Triss. The lady you send Alvin to will be pleased, whereas the one who is scorned will react poorly to Geralt throughout the rest of the game. After completing “The Source” , you have to talk to Alvin to “bond” with the boy and appease your chosen lady of interest. Afterwards, furnish Shani with a Silver Garnet Ring, and you’ll get her second Sex Card. You cannot get both Triss #2 and Shani #2.

Townsfolk

You can find Dandelion sulking in the New Narakort. Drink with him, and after six beverages he’ll be drunk enough to come clean. He lost his lute at a local merchant’s house when he was caught in a tryst with said merchant’s daughter. Agree to help him recover his lute to start “Dandelion’s Lute” . Head to the house marked “Dandelion’s Lute” and fight or bribe Hobbs Pankiera-the distraught father of the little tramp. Once he is pacified, head upstairs and talk to Rozalind Pankiera. Tell her that giving up the lute will show that she dumped Dandelion-not the other way around. When she asks about a Witcher’s touch, offer to show her, and she’ll show you her Sex Card.

Triss #2

During the quest “The Source” , you’ll be forced to send Alvin to stay with either Shani or Triss. The lady you send Alvin to will be pleased, whereas the one who is scorned will react poorly to Geralt throughout the rest of the game. After completing “The Source” , you have to talk to Alvin to “bond” with the boy and appease your chosen lady of interest. Afterwards, furnish Triss with a Silver Ruby Signet Ring, and you’ll get her second Sex Card. You cannot get both Triss #2 and Shani #2.

Vampiress

After doing some sexy detective work with the Blue-Eyed Lass and subsequently reporting to her brother Patrick de weyze during the quest “Blue Eyes” talk to the Lady of the Night, who is on the second floor of “The House of the Queen of the Night.” You can either decide to “rescue” the Blue-Eyed Lass from the brothel, or enjoy unearthly delights by siding with the Lady of the Night. It should be obvious which option earns you this Sex Card.

Chapter 4¶

Celina

After talking to Alina and starting the quest “The Heat of the Day” head over to the Country Inn. Outside Celina and Julian will be arguing. After Julian heads inside, approach Celina and she’ll talk to you. Ask about the wedding, and she’ll throw a fit and ultimately offer herself to you if you provide a ring so she can one-up her sister. Give her any ring to get her Sex Card.

Elves of Murky Waters

Complete the quest “Daily Bread” then talk to the “Elf Woman” in the Elven Cave. Offer her some food and, after enduring some ungratefulness, you’ll get her Sex Card.

Lady of the Lake

Talk to the Lady of the Lake and ask her about her lost knights. She’ll encourage you to talk to the Hermit who resides in the fields about the Holy Grail. Do so, and listen to the Hermit babble at length about the subject. Return to the Lady of the Lake and pick the dialogue option “M’Lady! I have had a revelation and wish to embark on a mission.” The Lady of the Lake will warn Geralt off. Assure her it was a jest, and the two will begin flirting. The flirting session with Geralt ends, as usual, with a brand new Sex Card.

People of Murky Waters

Talk to a random “Peasant Woman” wandering around Murky Waters during the day. She’ll outright proposition you, just give her a Sugar Doll to seal the deal and get her Sex Card.

Chapter 5¶

Nurses

When you arrive at Old Vizima, you’ll have to escort two Nurses through the urban warfare to reach Shani’s hospital. During the quest “Under a Fiery Sky” you’ll have to escort Shani out of Old Vizima and into the Swamp Cemetery. When Shani is safely out of your way, return to the Hospital in Old Vizima and talk to the two “Nurses from Old Vizima” upstairs to get their Sex Card. You can only get this card if you are neutral.

Toruviel

During the quest “Hope Burns Bright” you’ll have to fight off some Order soldiers who attack Shani’s Hospital. When you leave you’ll find Toruviel outside, being accosted by some Order Knights. Kill them and follow her to the nearby Scoia’tael hideout. A Scoia’tael soldier will speak to you. Pick option #1 to speak to Toruviel, then while speaking to her, when you get an option to respond say anything to get her to proposition you. Accept and you’ll get her Sex Card. You can only get this card if you sided with the Scoia’tael.

White Rayla

During the quest “The Flame that Cleanses” you’ll have to fight off some Scoia’tael rebels who will attack Shani’s hospital. When you leave, you’ll find White Rayla being provoked by some Scoia’tael. Kill them and follow her to the nearby Order Command Post. An Order commander will speak to you. Pick option #1 to speak to White Rayla, then while speaking to her, when you get an option to respond say anything to get her to bet fiesty… pick option #1 to get her Sex Card. You can only get this card if you sided with the Order of the Flaming Rose.