Rosa's manuscript Lore Books

Description

A book of short stories secretly written in Lady Rosa’s hand. The last part is our work together.

Text

Wedding Toast
Unfortunately, I don’t know the bride, so I can’t congratulate her husband. And knowing the groom too well, I can’t congratulate the bride either.

On Innocence
A young man tenderly embraces his lady and says, ‘Am I your first lover by any chance?’ ‘Could be,’ she replies, ‘I thought I’d seen you somewhere before.’

Thinking is Not Knowing
A certain Kuttenberg Grandmaster once visited an old charlatan and wanted to know his fate. The charlatan examined his palm carefully and said to him, ‘I see you are the father of two children…’ ‘That’s what you think,’ he shook his head. ‘I am the father of three children!’ ‘That’s what you think…’ smiled the charlatan.

Repent, Adam’s Generation
A. von Wallenstein and Raimund R. Hardt on men and women
As many, and men in particular, will gladly testify, of the two generations, it is the female that is imperfect, prone to all manner of sins and faults. It is an old known truth that the testimony of many is a credible testimony, the truth of which cannot be doubted. But who hath appointed the woman her lot? God? Or man? Who has decreed that woman is incapable of thinking, acting and deciding without the guidance of man?
By whom was it determined that women were too foolish and vice-ridden to participate in matters wholly male - politics, science, or the liberal arts? Is such a resolution supported by experience or evidence? After all, no one has ever given a woman the opportunity to demonstrate the necessary judgment and wit. We have only conveniently condemned it as inadequate, and have made this judgment an established truth which no one dares to question.
We have witnessed many injuries to the daughters of Eve, and therefore may, or rather must, testify that the world is unjustly ordered in this respect. Men are fond of exalting themselves above women and attributing all sorts of wrongs to them, but only to cover their own faults!
A man who accuses a woman of vice has squandered his own youth in licentiousness. In old age, these men recall with regret the sins of their past life without ever repenting of them. It is out of this bitterness that they denounce women, in order to humiliate and vilify them in the minds of all who are willing to listen to them. These corrupt old men are like incurable leprosy.
But even more than women, men prefer to elevate themselves above other men. For example, they claim that husbands who listen to their wives’ advice are fools and deserve ridicule. But we say that a man who has a wife who is sensible and wise, and refuses to listen to her, is twice as foolish!

The Gravedigger’s Jest
What do you call a woman who knows exactly where her husband is every night? A widow.

On the Wisdom of the Elders
A father says to his son on his wedding day, ‘Remember, son, that a newlywed woman loves well and cooks badly. But wait a few years and it will be just the opposite.’

About an Eloquent Lady and a Bad Dancer
It is known that anyone can point out someone’s shortcomings and bring shame upon them. But only few can point out someone’s faults in such a way that the unfortunate person notices them without causing public ridicule.
I will tell you of a lady who mastered this art. She was not only clever and quick in speech, but also young and beautiful to look at. When she appeared in society, men flocked to her. The young men asked her to dance and offered their arms, the older ones asked for her hand in marriage and offered what little the old men could still give to the young lady.
Suddenly a young man asked her to dance. He had a handsome face and fine manners, so the lady accepted his proposal. After a few steps, however, she realized that she had made a big mistake. The dancer seemed to have two left feet. He stumbled, tripped, almost fell several times, and despite his apologies, the lady found dancing with him a torture. The other dancers noticed this, and began to whisper and point in their direction.
Any other would have embarrassed him with indiscriminate words. She might even have told the other ladies to watch out for such loser. Not the lady in my story. What does it matter if he’s a bad dancer? she said to herself. Others may dance with ease, but they also drink with it, indulge in dice and light girls. Better a bad dancer than a good drinker.
So she smiled and said out loud for all to hear, “Young sir, how I would love to keep dancing with you. But I wore the wrong shoes today. They’re pushing me so hard that I can’t go on. Please escort me out into the fresh air.”
Her dancer quickly understood what she meant by that remark and hurriedly walked with her to the door. Everyone present thought that perhaps she was going to give him a hard time at the door, or give him a well-deserved slap. The lady and her dancer, however, did not return to the entertainment that evening.